NPR Angries Up the Blood

25Sep08

(Reposted from my LiveJournal.)

NPR conspired to get me all cranky this morning over the latest news out the GOP orifice.

First, the VP debate is cut down to the highly-structured kindergarten version, because delicate flower Sarah Palin can’t handle defending her plans for the nation against a single U.S. Senator like a real live grownup. Which should make EVERYONE ask how she plans to defend – to say nothing of implement – those plans against 100 U.S. Senators, 435 U.S. Representatives, and, oh, the rest of the world should in cold hell she ever become President.

If you need any more evidence that THIS IS NOT THE PERSON FOR THE JOB, well, I can’t help you.

So our delicate flower is sheltering against the brutal winds of political reality. Meanwhile, our Too Old to Play a Cowboy Anymore, Really, It’s Pathetic GOP Presidential nominee is calling off his own debate in order to scuttle back to Washington and pretend he can singlehandedly do something about the rampant termite damage in the financial market. No, McCain, it doesn’t even LOOK noble. It LOOKS like you’re trying to sucker whatever you can out of a situation that is horrible all around, but which your own party caused. It LOOKS like you’re setting yourself up so that in forty days, if Obama wins, you can say “if he had come back to Washington like I did, we wouldn’t be here!”, and if you win, you can say “think how much worse things would be if I hadn’t canceled that debate!”

When the obvious truth, of course, is that there is nothing your single pair of pasty white hands can do about the mess that requires you to also scuttle out on oh, I don’t know, discussing how your party got us into this mess and how you might get us out of it. But that’s going to be instant FAIL for you, and you know it.

Speaking of the financial markets, I love (by which I mean “loathe”) how we’ve been told for years there’s no money for any extension of nationalized health care, that it’d bankrupt the nation (single-payer probably would, but that’s another post), and that if you’re not willing to shell out more and more for coverage that covers less and less, well, go die in a puddle you Commie fuck seriously you must have deserved to be born with those eleven separate crippling illnesses and then to get hit by a drunk driver who removed your legs.

Yet one day we discover extensive termite damage in the basement of our financial castle, and HOLY SHIT: $700 billion dollars! GIVE US NOW! Which, as The Daily Show so helpfully pointed out on Tuesday, is 2,000 McDonald’s apple pies for every man, woman, and child in this country.

Assuming that’s the retail price, and it’s too early in the morning for me to remember where I put my calculator, that’s $1,000 for every man, woman, and child in America. THAT’S NATIONALIZED PREVENTATIVE CARE. One physical, one preventative screening of your choice, and possibly two dental cleanings, EVERY YEAR, TOTALLY FREE, FOR EVERY PERSON. It’s tautological, but THINK of how much disease we could prevent in America if we prevented disease in America.

But no, let’s just hand all that cash over to Henry Paulson. (Who, as the Daily Show also helpfully pointed out, also demands he be allowed to wear a cape and referred to only as Baron Von Moneypants.)

Meanwhile, if someone says “maverick” one more time….

NPR also replayed the same pieces from the Palin interview with Katie Couric that pissed me off the first time I watched it. This time, though, I noticed an eerily familiar ring to her rhetoric excuses for John McCain. “You have to understand where he’s coming from…. He’s so misunderstood, he takes shots from both parties….”

“He’s not like that. He’s so misunderstood. Everyone’s out to get him.” Ms. Palin, when I worked for the prosecutor’s office, we called women who protested such things about “their” men “domestic violence victims.” John McCain: out to batter your country.

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One Response to “NPR Angries Up the Blood”

  1. I appreciate the time you put in this work or in this post. Although you have bright ideas, I really can’t agree with them. I’m sure there are better ways to walk through this bad situation. Not trying to insult or troll or anything .


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